Oh geez, stupid Eric, so stupid. Why don’t these people like me yet?!? Didn’t I give them what they want? First they said I should be using my offensive line to run the ball more, and we blew it when I ran it three times on first and goal against a strong Pats front seven. Then they say I should “unleash” Brett Favre even though he’s only three weeks into the offense, and we get clobbered by a strong Chargers secondary that was giving us the run all night and has an offense that lives for opportunities to move the ball! Hell, I even called slants with a quarter of a yard between us and a two point conversion. I might as well go into Thomas Jones's home and whisper self-esteem crushing things into his ear as he sleeps!
Hey, hey, aren't I still the Mangenius? Right guys? Right? Just tell me what I should do and I'll do it!
Don’t they understand that I should be given credit for doing whatever the newspaper says I should do, regardless of situations or opponents? I mean, far be it from me to imply that Mark Cannizzaro of the NY Post might NOT be qualified to coach the team; that’s not the kind of attitude that gets you guest spots on The Sopranos! Hey, if the point of coaching a football game isn’t to get people to like you, then I don’t know what is!
I really hope this doesn’t take away from my candidacy for most likeable coach in New York!